30 May, 2012

We don't recognise them because --

We all watched Satyamev Jayate. We all learnt that child sexual exploitation is more prevalent than we thought. We brought home the fact that 53 per cent of children have gone through this torture. We know that 53 per cent of boys silently carry the pain of abuse within them. If one in two children has been a victim of this evil, we know, that we know many who carry the weight of sexual abuse; we just don’t know that they have been there and been through it all. Now we know that the abuser doesn't look any different, that the abuser walks among us. Similarly, the abused walks among us.

We don’t recognise her
Because
She chose to hide the pain 
Behind
Her all-deceiving smile.

We don’t recognise him 
Who put
On his bravest smile
Because 
He was trained to bite the bullet.

We don’t recognise her
Because 
She chose to live on
Without 
Hurting those who loved her.

We don’t recognise him
Who borne
It all -- silently, only
Because 
He would not be believed.

We don’t recognise her
Because
She bottled it all up,
She couldn’t
Bear all the blame too. 

We don’t recognise him
Who knew not
That he was being molded
For abuse 
None told him what abusers did. 

We don’t recognise her
Because
She had instructions
Never to 
Disrespect ‘older people.’

We don’t recognise him
For he 
Walks amongst us
Because 
He chose to go on living.

We don’t recognise them
Because 
They vented out in the form
Of creativity.
The pain -- in colours and in words.

***


We have to keep this conversation going so as to save our children this pain. We have to spread the word to save them this silent suffering. The parent in me is thankful for the workshop segment of episode 2 of Satyamev Jayate. If you missed it or want to watch it again - Workshop for children.


Here's a little about the grooming that abusers do Child Sexual Abuse: 6 Stages of Grooming from Oprah.com


You might also want to check out The Silence that Never Was by Bhavana on Tilling the Earthwoman
And here's Indu Chibber's post on How to tell a child is being abused

39 comments:

  1. am thankful for the workshop too. Loved the simplicity with which it was done.
    Nicely penned!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're right Uma. Simplicity is the word. Now why hadn't we thought of it before, right? This is something we can do very easily. Good for us.
      Thank you so much, Uma.

      Delete
  2. Certainly...Every child deserves a safe and secure childhood!
    Well worded piece..:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Every time Oprah did shows around this subject and every time she put up stories of how these shows changed other people's lives, I wondered when we'd talk about it in India.
      We're there, finally. And because it was Aamir who spoke about it, it's loud enough. I have no doubt that this will benefit some more kids. Every child does deserves a safer and more secure childhood.

      Thanks Panchali.

      Delete
  3. both abused and abuser walk among us; we don't recognize them. beautifully written Nambiar!! people have to change, the mentality has to change and only then less number of people will suffer (i don't think we will ever reach a stage when no one will suffer)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree. We probably never will get to that stage where no one will suffer.
      As far is this particular social evil in concerned, there needs to be a lot of awareness especially in a country like India. I wish Satyamev Jayate gave more emphasis to the fact that people who sexually abuse children do some 'grooming.' We're taught never to be be ungrateful to people who do things for us and never to disrespect anybody who is older to us. Little do the victims of abuse know that abusers do things for them, just to get them to do what they (the abusers) want.

      Delete
  4. the tragedy brought to the fore, finally.
    well written

    ReplyDelete
  5. ...the simplicity in your lines speaks volumes, Divya. Absolutely wonderful and so meaningful! Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This episode affected me so much.
      Thank you Amit.

      Delete
  6. You have conveyed a nice message through the poem, Parents should pay due attentions to the subtle messages the children may be trying to pass through drawings and other such activities.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're right, USP. We should play a whole lot of attention. Those messages are so very subtle, unfortunately. I'm sure you're a worried parent too. Let's hope that talking about it will make it easier for kids to talk about it too.
      I made my hubby watch this episode, coz I thought the daddy should be aware of this. So I kind of watched it a second time. This episode really did get to me.

      Delete
  7. touchd and moved after watching that episode ... n now your blog post ...
    being a responsible human we all are equally responsible to save the sufferer andd fight against evil..
    agreed to debajyoti ... abuser too walk among us infact sometimes a trustful person only decieves.
    i appreciate Aamir'effort which made we all so sincere about it.
    well work done by you too to knock a very important session.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too -- I appreciate all that the Satyamev Jayate team is doing. Thank you so much, Jyoti.
      Welcome here. :)

      Delete
  8. Beautifully Written. I dont get Star Plus here and am yet to see Satyameva Jayate;s episodes online. But the feedbacks its been receiving kind of reflects the deep rooted impact it is having

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Jaish.
      You should watch it online. That's what I do too. The study results that they bring out on the show are really eye-opening.

      Delete
  9. I am silent, D. I am in tears. Finally, somebody got it. Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hugs, Bhavana. Lots of it.

      Delete
    2. Your write-up spoke volumes about the abused. It was so heart wrenching. I might know a thing or two about this; I might know a few who have been there. You are so right when you say - She just wants be loved (just loved).

      Delete
  10. u addressed a very serious issue in such a lovely and creative way...yes indeed we must all stand up against the perpetrators........its real sad who little children r being abused :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As of now, there's very little that can be done, but that goes a long way. Thank you for stopping by, Saikat.

      Delete
  11. Aamir Khan is bringing about a small revolution in the country...shocking facts came out to crush our hearts.
    Very well put....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A revolution it is. I'm sure 'some' good will come off it. Those are shocking facts. And since it's AK talking, we're listening. :)Thank you so much for coming by again.

      Delete
  12. Well written and thought provoking... SMJ is doing ah good job of making people aware of the rubbish that goes on in our society.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Ash. Yes, the is doing a pretty good job at creating awareness and re-awakening us.
      That reminds me, I still have two episodes to catch.

      Delete
  13. Very beautiful and poignant piece of writing on a very sensitive issue. The fact that most of these pedophiles are people who are well known to the family in most cases makes me wonder whether we can really trust our relatives with our children.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly Akshay. What a scary thought, right?

      Delete
  14. Whoa....so much of response to ur post! way to go Div! It is just not only the show, ur post too that brings the reflection of the show in people! what they think abt the show and what they think abt the problem telecasted!!

    kinda a beginning to a revolution! As human beings, on humanitarian grounds, every child of the world must be provided a safe and comfortable growing environment.But it takes people like Aamir, to tell us what we shud do to acheive it. Look at how ignorant we can be!! But at the same time I truly appreciate Aamir, to have taken this huge step, unlike Shah Rukh- who is now just being buzzy with IPL!!!

    Anyways kudos Div, will soon write a post on this my own self. thanks for the inspiration. Love ya
    Sherin

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah Sherin, this is an issue that touched everybody, a lot of people can relate to it too.
      I'm so glad that this made you want to do a post on it. Please go ahead and do it. Shall come by and read it.

      Delete
  15. The trauma of CSA victim has been very well portrayed in this verse, Divya! Sad but true!

    ReplyDelete
  16. A strong revolution has started, slowly but forcefully. Nicely written

    ReplyDelete
  17. The poem was simply beautiful,so well expressed,& touching to the core-all abusers should be stoned to death.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Indu.
      I remember reading your post on this issue and what parents could watch out for. I should have linked it here. Let me do that right away.

      Delete